I liked this and thought I'd share. It's from The Friend magazine, May 2012.
There's a maintenance guy at work that is not only creepy, but he's also a fair bit dopey. Tuesday he came into the kitchen while I was in the middle of washing a dish (aka, I couldn't just high-tail it outta there). He said "hello" and so did I.
He: I'm just getting a couple'a sodas.
Me: Go right ahead.
He: (puts his money in, pushes the button, turns to me and starts talking small talk)
Me: (replies, watches him not take out the first soda and push the button for his second soda--realizing it's going to jam)
He: (reaches in to get his sodas) Uh-oh.
Me: Are they stuck?
He: Yep. I guess I shouldn't'a did that. (he then proceeds to stick his arm entirely into the machine and digs around in there as if he were birthing a calf--surprisingly he gets them out)
Me: At least you've got a refreshing drink to enjoy after all your hard work!
1 month ago